My parents seemed always to worry about money.

It was mentioned often in the walls of our home. 

“We cannot afford it” began every conversation about spending the dollar. 

We cannot, not, not, not

We cannot.

A limited point of view.

Whether we eventually spent it and enjoyed ourselves or not they had to have the conversation it seemed to me. Whether it was a meal out, a new shirt, a vacation, a bigger house, a new car, an acre of dirt 

we had the conversation. 

It really got me when my Dad, the one most convinced that we were poor, would actually bring up the question of whether we might splurge to have fun knowing all along 

he would take the most extreme position finally and eventually assure us we were not going to spend one dime, but first, 

he would torment us by beginning a “whole family’s desire” for something new.

I recall that every vacation went through several decisions not to go before we finally threw things in suitcases and hauled ass or we stayed home as undeserving, miserable people.

Just traveling, with nowhere to go, has given me to know what luxury really is-

I know not where my next meal is coming from. Experts define me as among the poorest of the poor to be pitied.  And yet I have a quiet mind. A quiet mind does not attract attention and cares not to impress anybody. It is that simple. Never does a conversation in my head occur before I act. Such action is uncorrupted by words. And I act from an intelligence that will suffer no nonsense. Trouble-free, this life has magic all over it, and I feel like the wealthiest human on Earth each and every day.

What is clear is it was never the “thing” our family lacked it was simply to be surprised with some new way to see what there is to see. Life, and life alone, absolutely overflows with an unlimited supply of that at all times and there is more than enough for everybody and the supply is protected in such a manner that nobody can deprive another of it. Clear thinkers are not concerned with greed and those others whose thinking is unclear see not the actual wealth though it abounds perceive not the existence even of a human being with a quiet mind. 

Sincerely, Johnny Smith

 Angels rush in where fools fear to tread and the joke is that the place is where nobody need defend himself against any other and beauty abounds all around and kindness rules and generosity overwhelms while harmony prevails. The place is timeless and is within the human consciousness of everyone deeper, much deeper than is the place of ego, also within us,  which was put together by the world of human beings over time so time rules there and it pleases human egos which fear in horror any place where time is not available to them for they worship time. 

Egos have to think, you know, and figure out everything in advance of action. Where the angels rush to be there is no thinking at all which means, of course, there is no confusion at all. You can go there instantly and stay as long as you like but you cannot take ego (your self image) with you. There is a way to work out an arrangement with ego (the thinker) to divide your life between the timeless and the time bound. Look very closely at both and realize, hey, we will let thinking do what it is good at and we will do the rest from the place of beauty. There is so much more intelligence where there is no wastage of energy on conflict and confusion.

 He who offers you nothing brings the greatest gift. Watch for that one. Drop everything when it is offered. Life is at stake. You know not how many opportunities will be yours this lifetime.

One body coming to another in silence allows communion,

a melodious way of living,

a bubbling up inside a thing rightly called love.

 By reason of images created in our brains are we taken out of our very own lives to always be dying. On the other side of death lies our real life we are taught to believe. We call it Paradise or Heaven or the like. Or reincarnation. Life has become a stage upon which we prepare for it, like in a rehearsal. It is the Pinocchio story we experience in an illusion of our own making. Real life escapes us. Real life is unknown to the illusion.

When two meet and fall in love, each with the image of the other, there is no love. It is called love by the images but it is concern for an image and that is not love. That false brand of love is the image of love not the fact of love. It is like we fall in love with the image of love not anything real.

 Love, a living thing, comes to no conclusion, not ever. It is there like scent in a flower. When self concern ends love remains.  Love may seem to come and to go but it is self concern that comes and goes. It seems love abandons us at its own whim but we abandon love with self concern. If I want to be naked but keep trying on clothes I can imagine the absence of nakedness as a loss. A man said to me “ I want to be free but I feel no sense of freedom”. The greatest freedom I know about is the discovery “I have never really loved anybody or anything. I have been most concerned about myself and have been calling it love.” At that point one can find that love is there. Cleaning is a negative process. One does not add cleanliness to a bathtub, one removes the dirt and exposes cleanliness that is there. Love is found in the same way. Self concern is that dirt. Love is a living thing.

 Following some years of careful consideration I am gonna make a bold statement 

When a human being accepts a position of authority over even one other person as say a professional; uhh, a short list would be as a teacher, preacher, business executive, lawyer, doctor, or a commissioned artist;  that person better be careful every step of the way. I did that. I know. Listen to your heart’s own question- “Hey, Man, what are they buying from you, really?” 

At some point the answer will come crystal clear. Those are wolves in sheep’s clothing and even they do not know it. They are bidding for my soul. They know something about people. They know that by owning my soul they will pay me hundreds of thousands a year today and make for themselves billions. That is a real unequal bargain. Take the case of a lawyer for example. Slowly but surely that job will become “just how far will you go to keep me?” Same is true for them all. If the person is not at all times clear the result will shock even him or her. You know what I mean.  

You may wonder why I include a commissioned artist in my list, well, it’s because that decision is placing the artist at odds within himself just as is the case with the others on the list. Anyone at odds within himself is going to be confused in the conflict.  It divides the artist in the same way as it divides the judge or the preacher. The person’s intelligence will gradually diminish so long as the conflict within continues. Faulty decisions will pile up. Now, I also want to add that Woody Guthrie is a model for that as an artist.  He refused to be work for the do-re- mi. Just a popular example. Consider: can I work for the dollar and what it represents for me and those I call my family and at the same time work for the singer in the song of my heart? Which is the most reliable employer? It may be an uncomfortable question to someone but that discomfort stems entirely from our conceit.  If anyone can rid himself of conceit then the answer to the question will be clear. All depends upon the level of the human being’s sincere yearning to know whether conceit can be obliterated never to return. That is the real work. Not the defined position of authority over others. Can I be rid of my conceit for good?

I am reminded of an old joke. Once a clever man was very much desiring to sleep with a particular woman. He asked her “would you go to bed with me for a million dollars?” Laughing,  the woman replied,  “I’d think about it; but, no, I would not not!” So, the clever man asked her, “Would you sleep with me for half a million dollars? “No” was her answer. Well then would you do it for say 100,000 dollars? “No.”  “How about fifty dollars then?”  “Are you crazy? Just who do you think you are talking to?”  “LOOK, LADY, WE HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED THAT AND WE ARE NOW JUST HAGGLING OVER THE PRICE.”

It boils down to: if a man or woman wakes up in slavery nothing else matters but 

 freedom.