A WHOOPER SWAN'S DIARY: 12/06/22

THE STORY OF JOHNNY WHOOPER SWAN We go to school trusting our parents. We meet a teacher there who stands up front with a big desk, and a pointer. She or he trains us in an authoritative manner. We attach mentally to a life long need for authority in order to live lives successfully. Right so far? In my case, at the age of 25 I was ready to enter the practice of law where I hoped for success and a happy life finally. Very shortly, very shortly, I became anxious. There was a foreboding. I was made more uncomfortable with each experience. Law work is nothing like what I was told it would be. The system is corrupt. But I still cling to my expectation that career success is necessary to my happiness as a man. Each day my grasp of what the fuck success amounts to after all becomes more clouded, murkier. I hear songs on the airwaves and at concerts which describe my life as the life of a fool. What am I becoming? I want to rip off my business suit to run naked in the street with my hair on fire! But I am too afraid. In strange, weird (weird comes from a word meaning wise), fragmented steps I go about a journey of my own believing myself to be the first man to have failed in such a total way which journey works so as to break up my career, end a marriage, and start an entirely new way of relating with my two children whom I love deeply. Almost magically I meet a woman who is a career counselor who asserts a beautiful message that I am made to be joyful in my work everyday and at all levels. This understanding sets me on a completely new course. It is no longer a world of systems to me but an undivided one of unlimited beauty. It reminds me of a painting. A true masterpiece. I am drawn from within to learn the truth about my identity and nobody else can teach me that. From this point onward I will use thinking capacity for mastering mechanical processes and follow my heart, which includes my whole nature, which includes your whole nature and that of every human being for all the rest. I’ll go by the name Johnny Whooper Swan who does not explain itself to anyone. By my fruits shall I be known. Watch me soar!

Tuesday, December 6, 2022

Love broke a man’s heart. He wrote a song. The song touched many others. He became famous for it. He met another woman and felt this is the right one for me. This one will bring the pleasure and security I so desire for the rest of my life. I am sure of it. Little did he know love is not pleasure.

Love comes to tear your heart apart and render you helpless as a newborn kitten. Love is the opportunity of a lifetime. We often too quickly transfer our allegiance to an object of love leaving the love that is inside us that brought us to our knees behind. Great and painful disappointment follows. You keep on believing love is pleasure as something you can control. The songwriter writes another hit song and life goes on. Nobody questions to the core. Nobody learns. We limp around not feeling real. In complete ignorance of the power of love to face the senseless cruelty and violence that is us, we are dripping in blood. This is your life, Clown!

The opportunity love affords is the chance to choose it with all your heart. With no thought for your future or any desired outcome accept the wide open field of infinite possibility in store for you regardless of the impact that may have on you and all your many plans and wishes. Bring it on! is all you need say with all your being and what unfolds will be your destiny à la love. You shall know what it is to love the unknown more than you love yourself and you will never leave its unlimited charms. You otherwise sentence yourself to a dull, small, insignificant, crummy life you cannot imagine could be all life is for and spend it busy dying. The chance spoken of here to be born anew with every breath may come but once so for goodness sake be aware!