A WHOOPER SWAN'S DIARY: 09/03/21

THE STORY OF JOHNNY WHOOPER SWAN We go to school trusting our parents. We meet a teacher there who stands up front with a big desk, and a pointer. She or he trains us in an authoritative manner. We attach mentally to a life long need for authority in order to live lives successfully. Right so far? In my case, at the age of 25 I was ready to enter the practice of law where I hoped for success and a happy life finally. Very shortly, very shortly, I became anxious. There was a foreboding. I was made more uncomfortable with each experience. Law work is nothing like what I was told it would be. The system is corrupt. But I still cling to my expectation that career success is necessary to my happiness as a man. Each day my grasp of what the fuck success amounts to after all becomes more clouded, murkier. I hear songs on the airwaves and at concerts which describe my life as the life of a fool. What am I becoming? I want to rip off my business suit to run naked in the street with my hair on fire! But I am too afraid. In strange, weird (weird comes from a word meaning wise), fragmented steps I go about a journey of my own believing myself to be the first man to have failed in such a total way which journey works so as to break up my career, end a marriage, and start an entirely new way of relating with my two children whom I love deeply. Almost magically I meet a woman who is a career counselor who asserts a beautiful message that I am made to be joyful in my work everyday and at all levels. This understanding sets me on a completely new course. It is no longer a world of systems to me but an undivided one of unlimited beauty. It reminds me of a painting. A true masterpiece. I am drawn from within to learn the truth about my identity and nobody else can teach me that. From this point onward I will use thinking capacity for mastering mechanical processes and follow my heart, which includes my whole nature, which includes your whole nature and that of every human being for all the rest. I’ll go by the name Johnny Whooper Swan who does not explain itself to anyone. By my fruits shall I be known. Watch me soar!

Friday, September 3, 2021

PROBLEM SOLVING

When young, you were introduced to problems. The young horse is introduced to a bridle and saddle. You were introduced to school and the problem first was reading and writing in a language. This was to be the foundation of your life as the bridle and saddle were to be the foundation of the life of the young pony right up to death. So it was with you. Both are the same essentially. The brain of each is filled up with problems until finally it can do no other thing but solve problems. Now, the process of problem solving is such that every problem solved creates more problems or throws more problems at you that you cannot escape, must deal with, although they will, each one, of course, create more problems when you do. One day you may reach a point in all this when you just throw up your hands and admit “I am damned if I do and I am damned if I do not”. At that point you may ask, “Can I be free of all this mess? Is it at all possible?” Should you really want to know, ask your deep existence (which never was interested in school) and it will be given you to know. And, it will feel to you like, “Hey, what took you so long?” You will also learn to know that which lies beyond intellect to be ever so dedicated, kind, patient, loving, and merciful. You had it all along.