An Inventory of Troubles

The Questioner from inside the brain asks the brain: “Why are you in conflict?

Here I am. Age about 40. A man. Very confused. So confused am I that I begged for help from some folks who told me they had been as confused as me and found freedom from it. I wanted that, too, finally. Up to that moment I had rather die confused than accept help. Getting help on life’s tests was cheating had been hammered into me at school. So, my brain began to reply to the Questioner by saying, “It’s been hammered into me all my life”. What do you expect of such a poor fellow as Me?” As the brain moved on in answer to the Questioner it discovered so many ideas it had in it that were so fierce it began to hurt. It ended up at I cannot stand myself. I had been sent to Sunday School as a lad to study the life of Jesus Christ and was asked by a parent at home, “Who do you think you are, Jesus Christ?” Then I was punished in front of friends from school. I was crushed to have failed so. That was my brush with religion as I understood it to be.

I do not need to go through the long list of the many ways I thought that I failed to measure up to what a man is supposed to be for all people to understand it. I was stranded in a world in which I am unworthy doing my best to become worthy or at least to hide as much of my unworthiness as possible from the authorities whoever they are. And I resolved to change. Many elaborate plans were made. Failed to change time after time. 

The important thing my brain told the Questioner was that it had been loaded with problems to solve from the earliest days of life. What can be expected from such an abused brain? It was predetermined to fail. More and more confusion and conflict was its certain destiny.  Suddenly, like a flash, I forgave my brain for even trying to manage such a goofy life and began anew. What would follow was completely unknown to me. Had to be.

But on this occasion I act, now, knowing all of time, the past, the present, and the future, are contained in the now. All problems require time and all time is contained in now. It is called by ancestors renunciation. Nevermore will I load up my brain with problems of its own. All are mine. Removing myself solves the problem instantly. This is my brain speaking. Problems imply time for their solution. I deal with them now! It has become impossible for them to pile up. My brain is free now.

I am what I am and it’s all I can be. I am fully appropriate to live a human life by my nature which is human when my brain is completely free of problems…not a single one does it carry. Free, it solves every problem by removing the cause

                                   immediately!

 

Note: What is not to be explained in words at all is the experience of someone who vanishes and does not want to be found. Or, what is an authentic human being (as opposed to a sponge) really like? The only treat I’ll toss is -creative. Find for yourself the difference between invention and creativity! It’s so much fun!