Cry A Little Bit

A quiet mind absent thought is a most powerful friend. A noisy one is trouble. When a man or woman puts together by thoughts all constructs of security she can imagine there is always going to result a person in conflict with practically all the forces of nature. Then insurance may become the next construct of security, meaning, “I’ll at least get some monetary payoff on my inevitable loss.” (unless a tricky lawyer has placed in fine print a loophole to favor the insurance companies and I failed to catch it.)

My inquiry today is into a possibility someone suggested to me long ago.  He said, “There must be a way to harmonize my individual life with all forces of nature since I am here inside it. I predict I can be fed by a world each day that anticipates  my needs before I do when I am so aligned within it that I am at one with it. This is love. The same love can propel me along a songline that has on it my name as if I were anticipated before even my birth. Let us try it out for ourselves.”  I agreed. I have found it to be so as my friend told it would be. 

A faraway memory just appeared in my head. I was once a drunk who denied it to be so. On a Thanksgiving I had been invited to the home of a friend for a feast but was lost without a map and could not find my friend’s house, though I knew I had to be close. I decided (before cell phones were even marketed) to stop at just any house nearby and ask to borrow the use of a telephone to call my friend for directions. Pulling  up in front of the nearest house, I parked and walked to the front door and rang its doorbell.  A man opened the door.  I explained my situation and asked humbly for the use of his phone. He was most agreeable and invited me in.  His wife entered the front room and he introduced us telling her I needed to make a telephone call. After I made the call and was about to leave it became obvious the couple wanted me to stay awhile.  Without using the words they began in some unusual  way to beg me to remain with them, not to leave immediately.  I hesitated long enough for the man to tell me, “We have had some very sad news today.” His wife nodded. I replied, “Oh?”

The man added, “We just received a call telling us our son, our daughter-in-law, and both of our grandchildren were killed today in an airplane crash.” At that moment I was informed truly that I was the one chosen to give time to these two strangers in need of someone with ears to listen. Chosen by whom? What? Only a short time later was I to be led to an AA meeting where some former drunks had gathered to listen to me when I needed it and was ready to open up my pain to them. When such harmony is happening it is impossible to say who is helping whom. Really. I will stop for now to cry a bit.