What's
all this talk
in religious or
spiritual language? I do not trust lingo that presumes in advance I
agree it has meaning.
Its direction seems
always to be pointing out that I should be more than I am. I suspect
it is the language of people who are sure of themselves and who want
something. If the only purpose of it is to lure minds into a
nonexistent world of imagination and belief I am not interested. I
have been there. I consider myself fortunate, blessed even, to have
escaped such nonsense with my life. Perhaps the allure of all that
language to a human being is a promise someday things will change and
I will understand. But if it cannot deliver the goods, what then? It
has been spoken and written for a very long time without those hoped
for results materializing. For many the promise is all about a life
after death. What about now? I am alive. I yearn. Somebody said,
life has no purpose, make one up. That makes no sense. Purpose by
definition, cannot be falsified. Has anybody here seen dignity?
Bob?
I
choose one term out of the bag of words with either no meaning or
1000 meanings, take your pick. The
same. The word I choose is
soul. I will look for
mine. When I find it, I will say, Oh, there you are. And caress it
and in that caress give myself to it where I find it and be done with
all else that is not it.
I
look for what in me is restless,
discontent. What I find I will console and make content, or die in
the attempt. I seek something or someone who has been rejected, left
out, abandoned. I need some
realization not some pacifier. It is not in the word soul I
will find it. I seek to know me as I am where I am in the situation I
find myself to be doing what I am doing with my chance
called life. I want the truth
of it.
In
that yearning I sense what is stirring me to seek it. It is not too
late. Nor is it too soon.
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